Last night’s sunset was cancelled due to fog. Even the gulls were grounded. Of course I had thoughts on the Michigan mist.
I still remember vividly leaving home after high school. Heading off to college. A college I had never visited. Twelve trips to various schools had left me unconvinced. I chose a college based on a lengthy conversation with an Economics professor, who suggested I research and compare his school to my other choices. Once completed I had decided. Eventually loaded my car, and drove alone to what would be my four year home. Sight unseen. There was the fear, and excitement, of traveling to the unknown. There was also the fear of leaving behind my little town… even thought I was so psyched to leave.
“And after it rains there’s a rainbow
And all of the colors are black
It’s not that the colors aren’t there
It’s just imagination they lack
Everything’s the same back in my little town…..
And all of the colors are black
It’s not that the colors aren’t there
It’s just imagination they lack
Everything’s the same back in my little town…..
Nothing but the dead and dying back in my little town
Nothing but the dead and dying back in my little town
Nothing but the dead and dying back in my little town”
Nothing but the dead and dying back in my little town
Nothing but the dead and dying back in my little town”
Paul Simon’s song played as I drove. Literally. I had recorded it on my drive cassette tape mix. A couple dozen times it burned into my soul as I drove. Escaping that little town was a dream, a goal, an inevitability. Inevitable for me, but not for most of my friends left behind. Many forever still in that loathsome little town.
Thru the fog I drove. Leaving behind the black soil of my little town. Fertile earth, but sterile minds. I trusted my lighthouse was there, thru the fog. And it was. Four fantastic years.
And then it was over. This time I was not so eager to escape. College life was in many ways where my spirit was nurtured. That, and endless parties. But it was time. Once again, into the fog. Driving alone again to a venue never before visited. And a first full time job. A career. Thirty eight years of sweet highs and acidic lows. Near the end, lows so low that I hated my job as much as I hated my little town of my youth.
And again, into the fog. Leaving, driving, this time to a beautiful and somewhat familiar paradise. But touch of fear in my heart somewhere. Everything I had read, there were warnings. Rocky shoals ahead. Such a dramatic life change. But they were all wrong. Unfounded fears. The lighthouse was there. The best of everything. And none the worse than leaving for college, or leaving for that first job. Change. Just positive, powerful change.