There I was, in a restaurant in Kansas City, relating to my uncle just how completely miserable I was at work. The details would make a good story. But one I will not write. The people involved in egregious management and cultural blunders are long gone. So many good people, also gone, and doing well in their new lives. The unit itself safely sold to another owner who will hopefully rebuild the business to former glory. The net personal result remained, I was more unhappy in my career than ever before.
Why? First I was always emotionally tied to the success of my businesses. And we were failing. Not just short-term, but long-term. And there were no visionary, courageous heroes among the top management that I believed in. So that 10% of happiness tied to circumstances was near zero, work-wise.
But that wasn’t the worst of it. The 40% of happiness related to actions/activities were under attack as well. Throughout the vast majority of my career, I was a partner with manufacturing, helping them succeed. Helping the business succeed. Day to-day decisions, tactical, strategic… supplying analysis, providing advice. And also building a team. My teams. Operations teams. Helping the teams grow, helping individual employees grow.
All that was gone. Close the books and provide raw data. That was the only focus. Monthly, quarterly, yearly. The variety of tasks was gone. The focus became so unbearably narrow. What started out as an emergency narrow focus became a permanent reality. My analogy was “The General’s Horse”. I had supported the General in battle. Helping lead the charge. Keeping the General safe. Sensing danger. Seeing the best path thru the rocks.
Then, the General was gone. I found myself on the farm. A plow horse with blinders on. Plow the next row. Nothing more. The real battle off in the distance and going badly. Miserable.
I had a new opportunity. Much more money. The opportunity to use my skills again fully. My uncle leaned forward. No ambiguity, no hesitation. “You can’t quit now. You are too close. You aren’t that many months away from freedom. Freedom that will give you options”.
He was right. Too close. But felt like a prison sentence. Counting down the months, weeks, days. An interesting note though. My happiness didn’t begin the rebound when I was finally free. But began to rebound when I developed my plan. The 200 day countdown I began on this blog. Freedom was coming, and my actions/activities had begun. I got my 40% back.
next post… creating happiness